When I Get Old
by simulacraryn
Summary: AC 245, Valentines Day – when memories fade or begin to fade, you do your damnedest to remember those days where your loved ones want to spend the most with you. Nothing will keep you down, nothing will stop you – even if the enemy is yourself. Series


For Elle_Smith.

Due to the way I split up the challenge, two people are getting gifts from me, but I forgot to give out a person a challenge, so thus, I am receiving two myself [sorry! Seriously wasn't meaning to be a hog!]. I want to thank everyone and I hope these fics are good for you guys. This one is for Elle Smith!

I hope you enjoy it, I kind of toyed a lot with the subject and figured I'd go with something most wouldn't expect. Happy Valentines Day!

Fifty years have come and gone, the world's spun and now a new generation ruled steadfast – keeping order and allowing for them to step back and enjoy life. At least that was what they had all planned, amongst themselves, when the time came. Instead, life and living on the edge caught on to them all in some way or form, at least that is how she thought while looking outside the window, her eyes catching the beauty of the Netherland's scenery. How much longer until they reached their destination, Relena thought, almost bitterly. Every year, she visited and every year, she cursed the gods above and below for this cruel fate. Her weary eyes catch sight of the rearview mirror, where her face reflects back to her. Creases and lines filled the sixty five year old woman's face, white- short cropped hair framed her face and the fire in her eyes had never died. It would never. Now as long as her heart beats and she retains some sort of strength to make the drive here every year.

Her hand feels the weight of another hand grasping, a squeeze to remind her she wasn't alone. Of course not. Behind them were the cars of the children, their children. Their grandchildren. The lives they made through the years, the family built between them. But this trip killed more of her resolve every time, as she didn't have the heart to witness the fall of the man they loved. - "Relena," - A heavy, tired voice spoke. When her head turns, she sees Duo's equally exhausted face.

The years wore down on him too, his once chestnut hair was now plagued with heavy gray, styled into a rockabilly style. He still wore black from head to toe, sleeves rolled up to reveal the tattoos he accumulated as a sweeper in space. The most poignant one resided in his forearm, a large silver and black cross with the decaying roses, symbolic of their time on earth. The once boyish looks, replaced with worldly knowledge as he looked down unto her left hand where the wedding ring sat, as it had for almost forty years. He brought up her hand to his lips, kissed it to remind her that he was there. - "We'll be there in a few hours."

"I know..."

"Have the doctors said anything?"

There was hope in Duo's voice, a hope long gone from Relena's. - "Doctor Volkë said he's been having some clear days, but what if… what if he's forgotten about us again, Duo?"

There's that heavy silence.

Fifteen years ago, Heero began showing signs of mild confusion and disorientation. Things only got worse from down there, with his PTSD returning full force whenever he slipped back into the past. Relena and Duo witnessed the worst of it, with Heero nearly attacking one of the children, believing it to be Duo aiming a gun at him back in AC 195. Heero's mind continued to spiral, until one day Duo managed to get Heero on a clear day into the doctor's office.

A battery of tests, his medical records a hot shot mess of diagnostics making it impossible. Rule out brain tumor, rule out everything imaginable and time seemed to be against them. They watched their family crumble, he and Relena watched their Perfect Soldier, their shared husband, falling apart before them. No amount of reassurance from Heero would get the grim feeling out of their collective mouths. A year after the initial visit, after every last intricate possibility was ruled out, the news was dropped on their respective laps.

Alzheimer's disease, coupled with all the prior trauma to Heero's brain, was slowly eating away at Heero.

Duo and Relena knew it was game over from there. It was too late, too advanced already because of all the complications. So with swift action from 'their'[*] oldest child, Okada, they began researching alternatives. Something that would keep Heero near the best doctors, but without sentencing him to a dull existence as he would never forgive them for it. Hogewey was an established clinic, that ran a gated community for Alzheimer's patients in Weesep.

Every major holiday, the entire family would come visit.

Heero, in his memories, believed he was doing a mission. In his memories, he believed he still worked for Preventers, desk job and that he was away helping the town. On his days of clarity, he'd get visitors in the form of his children and grandchildren. Or even Duo's own kids. Relena spent her time between their old residence and the clinic. It was a dual life that they had agreed upon. It still broke their heart.

"Relena, he would never forget us."

The words fly in the face of adversity and the unknown, but Relena understood where Duo's hopeful sentiment came from. She loved them, both of them and the way he graciously handled their lover losing bits of himself throughout the years. - "Duo...how do you-?"

With that familiar, mischievous smile, Duo casually moved his hand to her knee. It's a reassuring motion, one that made Relena still blush like that young woman she'd once been. - "Because, Alzheimer's pushes you to only recall the past. Heero's past includes us, sure, it includes all the shitty stuff that happened to us and the war, but it has us in it. Relena, haven't you ever realized Heero still looks at you with awe and wonder? He still looks at me like I'm a thorn on his side… he's in there, still hanging on. You can forget your present, but not when it's been forged by the past."

The words smack her, side blinding the former politician. Tears well in her eyes as Duo begins to slow down at the first set of gates. Recluse in her own thoughts, Relena feels herself going into that zone of mother, of lover and of fighter. She knew Duo was likely entering that place, especially when the comm-link rings. Relena reaches for it before Duo can, the camera coming to life. Relena's surprised it is not Okada, but rather her daughter with Duo, Elaine. - "Mom, Okada said he's lagging a bit behind. Sai started feeling ill from lunch, so they're having to stop so she can let it out. He shouldn't be too far behind from us, though."

Relena smiled, understanding exactly that Sai inherited Okada's motion sickness and she recalls of many times where Heero was in the exact same position with the children. - "That's alright, Elaine. Do you want us to pull over and wait for your brother?" - It was just uncanny how much Elaine looked like Duo, just with Relena's natural hair color. Sometimes she looked at her children and couldn't help but feel pride, love. And of course, she felt anger – mainly because now Heero couldn't enjoy their grandchildren. - "Okada should be catching up soon," - She barely hears Elaine say, because Duo was jumping ahead and instructing Elaine to wait for 'Kada to catch up and that he just pulled over. Because that was the patient man Duo had become in their later years. When the communication cuts off, he turned to her and Relena couldn't help but to offer him a kind smile.

"Duo, how is it you always know what to tell me?"

"Because, it's what people who love each other do. We know what to say, I mean...I'm not infallible, but..."

"You try and I love you for it."

The village looked cozy, always welcoming to anyone coming in from the outside. But Relena, Duo, the children – they all knew it's true face. It was a barren, self made world to contain those that were slipping into an abyss. It's beauty was only but a manufactured simulation of reality, one that disgusted Relena, but amazed her nonetheless. The was a certain look of pain in Okada's eye as he studied the ever growing village as he flanked his mother's side, cautiously whispering: "I see more and more war veterans."

"I know," - Relena adds, worried by the growing statistic. - "Look into it, but do so when we leave."

Her son nods. Out of all their collective children, Okada and his wife Sai, were the politicians. Elaine and the others took more relaxed careers, fearing they could not withstand the constant pressure that their brother and mother lived under. And sure, while Relena no longer actively served as a member of parliament, she was still viewed by the younger generation as a wealth of information. - "Mister Maxwell, Mrs. Darlian?"

Of course, a nurse had to come in…

"Mister Yuy will be with you shortly, we're just clearing him from the hospital ward. He suffered a bit of a tumble yesterday and keeps insisting he can 'repair his knee' on his own."

Duo and Relena both groaned, while the children looked at the nurse and their parents with a humored look. - "Figures he'd try that..." - Duo mutters.

"Don't tell me, he got into one of his old memories and jumped off a building again?"- Relena asks, the nurse looking mortified. - "It wasn't a building, thankfully, but he jumped out of a speeding car!"

"Duo..."

"I'll go pretend I'm rescuing him and get him to stop trying to 'fix' his damn knee. Let me guess, the same one he had replaced..."

"Correct."

It was dawning to be one of those extremely hard days, both Duo and Relena came to figure. Duo moved ahead of Relena, motioning her to stay behind with their kids. He was used to this side of Heero, the one that came on a particularly terrible day in which his memory would blank out to the days of old. To those days where survival was the only thing on their collective minds. He loved Heero, but on days like this, he loathed his partner.

Duo did not possess the same reflexes he had over forty years ago, when his hair was longer than Relena's and still bore it's chestnut color. These days, he was moving a bit slower than your average sixty year old and it was truly a result of injuries accrued while working in the fire department. It was injuries he accumulated as a sweeper and it was just the abuse his body had been put through. He was still built like an ox, according to Relena and his children, never quite 'tall enough' for the average male, but he had filled out over the years. Now some of it rested in his belly, not overly large, but enough to gain Relena's appreciative pokes with an earnest 'you've got that beer gut as the americans love to call it, going on…'

But armored with his love, Duo followed the nurse. He rolled up his sleeves, the myriad of scars and tattoos showing over his forearms, one of them was a dedicated piece to the loves of his life. A Space Helmet, a string of differently colored orchids [each representing something of his life] and a rosary all entwined – a reminder of home, of his love and his faith. There is silence from the nurse as she steps away, leaving Duo to knock on the door to the hospital room.

Silence.

Heero was probably playing possum. So with skill and determination from long ago, Duo pretended to pick the lock and allowed himself into the room.

Heero Yuy laid peacefully in the bed, looking as if he'd been hit with every single last tranq available, when in truth Duo could just tell the man had probably been snuck upon by a doctor with experience in cases regarding unruly war veterans. Considering the options, Duo looks over to the mop of unruly, salt and pepper hair that was Heero's head and smirks. The man was certainly awake, just pretending… so he closes the door behind him.

The nurse, left with a scared expression, turned around. Instead, she is faced with Relena – the woman wore a smirk over her face as she placed a caring hand on the nurses' forarm. - "Miss Kincaid, why don't you allow Duo to take it from here."

"But he's -"

Relena's convincing smile still played, but she dreaded needing to press further. Gently, she guides the woman away, towards Elaine and Okada – both ready to handle the issue at hand so that their mother needn't. Okada, with a well practiced glare, gestured the nurse towards Elaine as Relena moved for the door.

Meanwhile, Heero glanced over to Duo, his vision fuzzy for a few seconds.

"Heero."

"Duo."

"You recognize me?" - Duo asks, perplexed by the action. Was Heero having one of those clear days? - "A little...Duo, where is she?"

"Outside."

"Don't let her see me."

There's a hint in that voice. Duo's gut twisted into knots as he looked deeper into the meaning of Heero's words. This wasn't a clear day at all, Heero was certain something was only getting worse. Or maybe it was time? He dreaded to think, or even imagine what the consequences would be should it be the bitter end.

"How far have you slipped?"

"Duo, the doctors aren't giving it much time. The loss is becoming stronger. Doctor Volkë isn't saying how much longer I have… but, I don't want to spend it in this prison."

The words stun Duo as Heero forced himself unto his feet, limping visibly.

"Take me home."

"But you said you didn't want 'Lenie to see you like this..."

Heero gave an exasperated sigh, cramming some of his belongings into a duffle bag.

"I changed my mind." - There's a tiredness in his voice that Duo, in all their years together, had never heard - "If I'm going to die, I want to do it at home. Not here. Not in this lie of a village. I want my wife, I want you...our family. I don't want to die alone."

The weight of Heero's words, brittle voice, is enough to make Duo come into a steely resolve. If this was Heero's wish, he would grant it. They would live the last of his days, on his terms, which ever ones he could remember. Breaching into Heero's personal space, Duo pressed a chaste kiss unto his husband's lips, foreheads together. - "We would never let you die alone… we promised, until it does us part."

Soul crushed, the man once known as the God of Death took a minute to collect himself. Heero, the closest thing to immortality Duo had ever known, was scared. The man that did not know fear, whom had stared Death in the eye and escaped, though never unscratched was afraid to leave the world. - "You want to see Lenie before we check you out? 'Kada, Laine and the others are here too..."

"Yes. I want to see her..."

Duo turned his back, his eyes welling with tears that he carelessly brushes away with the back of his sleeve. When he opens the door, Relena's seated – ever so graceful, with one of their grandchildren resting against her chest. Duo glances in Okada's direction and without words, the oldest of their children reaches to their mother and asks for the child in return.

"Lenie, he wants to see you."

Relena bolted upright, a sprightly woman in her older years as she felt her heart beat faster. She knew that look in Duo's eye as she briskly walked in his direction. The last time she'd seen the 'look of Death' in Duo's eye, it'd been when Wufei passed away from pancreatic cancer fifteen years ago. The news had broken Duo beyond belief, as they had grown closer to the former pilot in their older years.

A subtle touch on Duo's forearm from Relena is enough to tell him she'd be alright. He respected that about her, ever since they had first met and she showed no fear of him, or Heero. Of what they were and did, to her, they were simply guys her age. People, not machines or weapons. That made him respect the woman.

When he first ventured into the world of dating, it'd been an awkward thing with Hilde, that turned out to be something lacking in chemistry. It didn't help Hilde was actually attracted to Trowa and they turned out to form a lasting relationship that still held strong. He then, at Catherine's suggestion, tried to date someone from the circus. It was disastrous, they lacked a fire that he knew to be in both Heero and Relena.

A zest for life.

So while healing and staying with Quatre, he learned of Heero and Relena's upcoming nuptials. Crushed him, again. But he was going to attend, to be Heero's best man.

Quatre and his ever loving empathy saw that Duo confess to both Heero and Relena. The couple, understanding of his desires, but unable to comprehend what they could do, turned to Quatre. The man proved to be an invaluable source of help, as he presented them with the ideals of marriage, according to different faiths. And while to the government, Duo's involvement would never be recognized, Relena went ahead and prepared all the legalities in the case the worst came to be.

The legally bonding marriage was for the politics, but once Heero and Relena retired from the public eye and they had moved to Amsterdam, things began to actually make sense to Duo. They were preparing for the day they could actually go out as a trio, without people hitting on him thinking Duo to be single. Now, he watched as Relena walked into an unpredictable situation, fearless as she'd ever been.

"Will mom be alright?" - Elaine's words rang in Duo's ears, as he turned, masking himself behind a playful smile - "Your mom's never been afraid of Heero. She'll be alright, I can't think of anywhere safer..."

Heero studied Relena, in his mind, he could only picture her as that bright-eyed, fifteen year old girl that found him at the beach. Before his tired eyes, however, she was larger at the hips, filled out from years of work and child rearing. Her once honey-blonde hair was mostly gray, but it fit her like a glove. Relena aged with grace and beauty, each crease and wrinkle carrying wisdom far beyond her years. He wondered how much of it came from his condition…?

"Relena, I want to go home."

She doesn't take it with levity, noticing the exhaustion in Heero's movements.

"Heero."

He perks up, his mind slipping slightly. It was a good day, at least for him and he fought it. Oh how he wanted to remember, but also to forget. To remember the good days and forget the horrible ones. When the doctors explained his condition, Heero hoped to whatever deity would listen that he'd be blessed with forgetting all the shit he'd done.

He moved, breaching the gap between them. She languished for a moment, before leaning into a quick kiss. It was their way of speaking without words and she understood fully, cradling his face into her hands. "Relena, please..."

"I know. I know."

Her whisper is an almost beg, to God or whomever, for clemency and for another moment. - "How much longer do we have, as a family?"

"Few months. I can't recall the numbers...I just want to be with you and Duo."

It took sheer will power not to break down and cry, hands shaking.

"Come with me."

She led him through the door, Duo waiting for them – his heart thumping against his chest. The look in Relena's eye told him everything he needed to know. Thus, Duo turned to Okada, nodding to the younger man. "Go fill the paperwork, we're bringing your father home."


End file.
